Poetry Slam pt 1

This feeling, this dreadful feeling, feeling like no one cares, feeling all alone, my feelings has been hurt before, so young, in denial, so forgiving, until my feelings couldn’t be hurt no more, took control, made things my way, made it so that you couldn’t hurt me, no, no one could but me, I was in control of my own hurt, I was the master of my own feelings, I was strong, and unbreakable. Then I met u, and I lost control, I lost me, and had feelings, feelings of love, joy, complete and total happiness, you gave me what no one else could, u gave me hope, a reason to live, to try, to attempt, to want, and now your gone, and I have no control, no hope, no reason to want to live, wanting wanting, feeling feelings, dying death, inside this heart of mine, chained by your love, distant from your love, emotionless, weary, dry, your love was powerful, it changed my outlook, my reason of being, alone I alone, sit by your thing, the one thing I held on to, I don’t want to forget you, but u me, linking this all back to a time before, the root of the issue, the main reason why these feelings were invented, you walked away and so did he, thinking of hurt and scars result in you, the both of you, is this my fate, to be broken in two, no real true real happiness, my will to is not, no one understands, especially not you, and even though I'm over it, it still hurts my heart to know, but the past is the past and my future who knows, but how broken I am will just be weights on the next, you made it hard for me to love and to be loved, now selfish is that, screw this poem, its more of my feelings, feelings of feeling like there is but nope, no hope, just nothing, so was it worth it, meeting u, knowing u, allowing myself to love you, I can honestly say NO, the heartache was too much, a second tear, hole, nail, stab, wound, just reopened the other one.